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Post by Alex on Jun 23, 2022 19:12:03 GMT -5
OOC: All these posts from those involved are to appear before The Fan's début. Just a bit of fun. Enjoy.
Sanction: Well with all the talk of this evening, it's time for some action. and our opening match, it's the 5 minute interview of The 'XS trained' Fan, we have a small montage put together by The XS on how the training went.
Video starts on the tron.
Novak: Ok kid. Today we boost your upper body. Lets see how much you can bench.
Eye of tiger kicks in and The XS puts 10kg on the bar, The fan can't lift it. The take 5kg off, still can't lift it. The leave the bar empty and he just gets it up once before he drops it on his chest.
The video changes to The fan trying to do a push up, Novak and Delonge go get a powerade, they drink it and throw it to the floor, the pile of bottles builds up to about 12, when the fan finally does a push up and collapses on the floor. The XS shake there heads.
But then it seems that The Fan is getting better as he does chin ups with no effort, until the Camera zooms out and shows Delonge and Novak lifting him by the feet.
Then Novak shows him some punches to a Punch-bag. The fan tries and misses falling to the floor.
This part ends with The Fan sat on a bench, taking a drink, leaning too far back and falling off it, pouring the drink on himself.
[TAG TO THE FAN]
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Post by Alex on Jun 23, 2022 19:12:30 GMT -5
Gasp... pant... groan.... Jesus Christ I'm fricking knackered I tells ya. Still though it's encouraging right fanfans? I think there was progress... let's ask the guys! Me: So what you reckon guys am I ready?
Novak: Have you ever considered taking out a good life insurance policy? I merely ask out of unrelated curiousity :sglare: Man, I'm so lucky to have these guys, they're always looking out for me. Delonge: Hey can we take a break from this? How bout some mic work?
Novak: That ain't really going to help him survive against Mongrel.
Delonge: Well yeah I know, but might lift our spirits a bit innit?ok fanfans I'm gonna do you a favour and fast forward because let's just say with cultural differences and whatnot it got off to a bumpy start. Someone really need to teach the Brits how to speak English. Anyway.... brace yourselves fanfans.... this is the first time I've used the interdimensional timeshift device.... Daz explained it to me briefly but he made even less sense than these guys behind me! Novak: You DO know we can still here you narrating right?Oooops! Anyway...here we go....squibblesquibblesquiggedoo........Blimey I ain't half dizzy. Anyway we seem to have skipped forward, I'm holding a mic in my hand and the XS are looking rather fatigued! Me: Everything alright guys?
Novak: Take 174...actionooops... told you this wasn't going smooth....ok... shhh... quiet now please fanfans I need to concentrate.... Me: The... RAIN...Novak and Delonge are looking up... so far so good, I might have it this time... Me:... in.... sp-sp-sp...
Novak: Come on you can do it....
Me: SPAIN
Delonge: Yes.... we might make it to Old Trafford for the second half...come on!
Me: Falls.... MAIN.... Lee on the PLAIN
Delonge: I think he's got it!
Novak: By jove he's got it!The scene erupts in an explosion of faux Spanish music as Baz enters playing AIR MANDOLIN, Dazz shaking AIR MARRACCAS and Chaz clicking those AIR CASTANETS... at least I think that's what they're called... you know those clickety-clackety things the Spics use? Chaz: That's not quite politically correct Deirdre Love! It's SPANISH.Oooops, sorry bout that fanfans, of course I meant those SPANISH things that the Spics use! Baz: Ting-twang...tink-tink-tonk tang Dazz: Shooka-shooka-shooka-shooka Chaz: Clickety-clack... clickety-clackNovak: Wonderful... we can now pass you off at the embassy ball...
Me: And the eggswah match with Mongrel?
Delonge: Nah mate, your dead meat! Never mind, let's go watch the footy.
Me: Oh that reminds me... I get to wear my new shirt... when you told me you were taking me to a Manchester game... check it out...Novak: Ummm...mate, you can't
Delonge: Hang on that's a brilliant idea!
Novak: What? He'll get killed!
Delonge: And if he don't...well if he can survive a Old Trafford in that shirt five minutes with the Mongrel will be a breeze :sclosed:
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